[ Man Narrating ] LAST WEEK, AS YOU RECALL, WE LEFT WILL, DR. SMITH AND THE ROBOT...
BUSILY REPAIRING THE WEATHER STATION,
UNAWARE THAT A FIERCE BAND OF GIANT ALIEN WARRIORS...
WERE EVEN NOW LANDING ON THEIR FORGOTTEN PLANET.
HERE ARE THE OTHER TOOLS, DR. SMITH. AH, SPLENDID. CUTTERS.
CUTTERS.
[ Grunts ] THERE. FINISHED.
WILLIAM, OUR OPERATION IS A SMASHING SUCCESS.
THE OPERATION IS A SUCCESS,
BUT, UNFORTUNATELY, THE PATIENT IS DEAD.
NONSENSE, NINNY. THIS WEATHER STATION IS COMPLETELY OPERATIONAL.
YOU FAILED TO SECURE THE WIRES OF THE SENSITIZER.
MAYBE YOU'D BETTER CHECK THE WIRING AGAIN, DR. SMITH, JUST IN CASE.
NONSENSE, MY BOY. IT'S IN ABSOLUTELY PERFECT ORDER. NOW, PICK UP THE TOOLS.
HELLO, SON. OH, HI, DAD.
WELL, HOW'S IT GOING, SMITH?
DO YOU WISH TO ANSWER THE QUESTION, DR. SMITH, OR SHALL I?
HOLD YOUR TONGUE, SIR.
AH! PROFESSOR. FINISHED.
A PUSH OF THE SWITCH IS ALL THAT IS NECESSARY.
VERY GOOD. THEN YOU SHALL HAVE THE HONOR OF CONNECTING THE RELAY STATION TO JUPITER 2.
SPLENDID.
OBSERVE. AAAH!
OBVIOUSLY A FAULTY RELAY.
ATTENTION, ATTENTION! ALIEN APPROACHING!
HE'S A VERITABLE GIANT.
HE DOESN'T SEEM HOSTILE. LET'S FIND OUT WHAT HE'S DOING HERE.
WE'VE HAD EXPERIENCE WITH THESE STRANGE SPACE CREATURES BEFORE, YOU KNOW.
I'M JOHN ROBINSON FROM THE PLANET EARTH.
HE PROBABLY DOESN'T UNDERSTAND US.
I'LL OFFER HIM MY HAND. THAT'S THE UNIVERSALLY UNDERSTOOD GESTURE.
OH, IT'S AN EXCELLENT IDEA.
- FRIEND. - YES, I'M A FRIEND TOO.
[ Dr. Smith Shouting ]
[ Will ] DAD!
[ Dr. Smith Shrieks ]
DAD, LOOK OUT!
NO! YOU MIGHT HURT DAD! AFFIRMATIVE.
[ Man Speaks In Foreign Language ]
I SAID, PUT HIM DOWN.
YOU MUST FORGIVE GROMACK. HE MEANT YOU NO HARM.
OH, SURE. ANYBODY COULD SEE HE WAS JUST HAVING A LITTLE FUN.
FUN.
I'M JOHN ROBINSON, FROM THE PLANET EARTH.
DR. SMITH AND MY SON, WILL.
HOW DO YOU DO? HI.
- WHO ARE YOU? - I'M KNOWN AS MYKO.
YOU FOUGHT WELL. I DIDN'T THINK YOU WOULD WIN.
LET'S GET SOMETHING STRAIGHT. YOU SAW THE FIGHT?
AND ENJOYED IT VERY MUCH TOO.
YOU COULD'VE STOPPED IT ANYTIME. WHY DIDN'T YOU?
IT IS GOOD TO SEE TWO STRONG CREATURES BATTLE.
BESIDES, I WANTED TO FIND OUT WHO WAS BETTER.
PROFESSOR ROBINSON FLATTENED THAT GENTLEMAN LIKE THE PROVERBIAL PANCAKE.
YES. I WAS SURPRISED.
IT IS SAID THROUGHOUT THE GALAXY THAT EARTH MEN...
ARE WEAK AND WITHOUT COURAGE.
WELL, THAT JUST SHOWS YOU THAT YOU CAN'T BELIEVE EVERYTHING YOU HEAR.
DO YOU LIVE ON THIS PLANET, MR. MYKO?
NO, I AM HERE FOR ONLY A SHORT WHILE.
UNFORTUNATELY, IT APPEARS THAT OUR STAY HERE WILL BE ON A MORE PERMANENT BASIS.
- OUR SPACESHIP WAS DAMAGED IN AN ACCIDENT. - THAT IS TOO BAD.
MR. MYKO, YOU WOULDN'T BY ANY CHANCE...
HAPPEN TO BE GOING ANYWHERE NEAR EARTH WHEN YOU LEAVE.
SORRY. I SHALL BE RETURNING TO MY OWN PLANET. PITY.
YES, ISN'T IT?
PROFESSOR ROBINSON, HOW MUCH DO YOU WEIGH?
ABOUT 190 EARTH POUNDS. 190?
BEHIND YOU! PROFESSOR!
JUST WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?
MERELY A TEST. I MEANT NO OFFENSE.
YOU'RE NOT MAKING TOO MUCH SENSE, MR. MYKO. MAYBE YOU'D BETTER EXPLAIN.
I AM A FIGHT PROMOTER, PROFESSOR ROBINSON.
EVERY YEAR, I HOLD A SERIES OF BOUTS ON THIS PLANET.
THESE GAMMA GAMES, AS WE CALL THEM,
ARE TELEVISED THROUGHOUT THE ENTIRE GALAXY...
AND WITNESSED BY HUNDREDS OF MILLIONS.
WELL, YOU'VE GOT A GREAT RATING, BUT WHAT DOES THAT GOT TO DO WITH ME?
YOU SHOULD BE VERY HAPPY, PROFESSOR.
I HAVE CHOSEN YOU TO BE ONE OF MY FIGHTERS.
YOU MAY BECOME CHAMPION OF THE ENTIRE GALAXY.
YOU MUST BE JOKING, MR. MYKO. I'M NO FIGHTER.
YOU ARE INTELLIGENT, AGILE AND STRONG.
YOU HAVE ALL THE NECESSARY REQUIREMENTS.
WELL, THANKS FOR THE COMPLIMENTS, BUT NO THANKS.
PROFESSOR ROBINSON,
YOU COULD BECOME CHAMPION OF THE ENTIRE GALAXY.
DO YOU REALIZE WHAT THAT COULD MEAN?
NO, I DON'T. AND WHAT'S MORE, I DON'T CARE.
YOU'VE GOT YOURSELF THE WRONG MAN. COME ON, SON. LET'S GO.
WHAT A SHAME.
PROFESSOR ROBINSON HAS PASSED UP A MAGNIFICENT OPPORTUNITY.
DID YOU SAY "OPPORTUNITY"?
NO EARTH MAN HAS EVER FOUGHT IN THE GAMES BEFORE.
THE ENTIRE GALAXY WILL BE WATCHING.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN PARTICULARLY FOND OF SPORTS.
THEY'RE SO-- THEY'RE SO HEALTHY.
YES, BUT THEY CAN ALSO BE EXTREMELY REWARDING.
DO YOU MEAN TO SAY THAT THE CONTESTANTS ARE PAID?
ONLY THE WINNERS.
THEY RECEIVE RICHES BEYOND YOUR WILDEST DREAMS.
RICHES, INDEED. HOW VERY, VERY INTERESTING.
[ Will ] ARE YOU COMING, DR. SMITH?
I SHALL BE ALONG IN A MOMENT, DEAR BOY, AS SOON AS I REPLACE THE RELAY.
YOU'D BEST GO ALONG WITH YOUR FATHER. YOU KNOW, A HEAD INJURY MAY BE VERY SERIOUS.
HE MIGHT SUFFER A SERIES OF, UH, DIZZY SPELLS.
I THINK YOU'D BETTER RUN ALONG, TOO, YOU ROLY-POLY ROWDY.
PRIVATE BUSINESS.
MR. MYKO, YOU WERE SAYING... "RICHES"?
I THINK YOU AND I SHOULD HAVE A LITTLE TALK.
WHAT DID YOU HAVE IN MIND, DR. SMITH?
I HAD IN MIND PROFESSOR ROBINSON.
HOW WOULD YOU LIKE TO HAVE HIM FIGHT IN YOUR GAMES AFTER ALL?
I'D BE DELIGHTED, BUT HE'S ALREADY TURNED DOWN MY OFFER.
A DECISION WHICH WAS MADE IN GREAT HASTE.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU CAN GET HIM TO CHANGE HIS MIND?
NO DOUBT ABOUT IT AT ALL, MY DEAR SIR.
HE AND I ENJOY A VERY CLOSE RELATIONSHIP.
HE ALWAYS FOLLOWS MY ADVICE ON IMPORTANT MATTERS.
NO ONE CAN DOUBT THAT YOUR OPINION IS EXTREMELY VALUED.
THANK YOU, MY DEAR SIR. YOUR PERCEPTION BOTH DELIGHTS AND AMAZES ME.
ALL THAT IS REQUIRED IS THAT I SUGGEST THAT HE FIGHTS, AND IT WILL BE DONE.
NATURALLY, AS A PROMOTER, I SHALL EXPECT A FEW MINOR CONSIDERATIONS FOR MYSELF.
"MINOR CONSIDERATIONS"?
HOW MUCH, AS YOU CALL IT, IS THE PAYOFF?
PAYOFF, SIR, IS SUCH AN UNPLEASANT WORD, ISN'T IT?
I SHALL REQUIRE HALF OF THOSE GREAT RICHES YOU MENTIONED EARLIER,
AS WELL AS PASSAGE FOR MYSELF BACK TO EARTH.
DR. SMITH, AGAIN, AS YOU SAY,
YOU HAVE GOT YOURSELF A DEAL.
AND YOU, SIR, HAVE GOT YOURSELF A NEW CHAMPION.
YOU FOOL! NOW YOU CANNOT FIGHT.
YOU ARE USELESS TO ME.
GOOD HEAVENS! MR. MYKO, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
THIS STUPID CREATURE HAS ELIMINATED HIMSELF FROM THE GAMES.
HE'S INJURED HIS ARM.
BUT SURELY HE WILL HEAL IN TIME. YOU WOULDN'T BE SO CALLOUS AND BRUTAL.
NO, YOU'RE QUITE RIGHT, DR. SMITH. I WOULDN'T.
I WAS MERELY TRYING TO FRIGHTEN HIM. HE'S NOT VERY INTELLIGENT,
AND A THREAT IS THE ONLY WAY TO TEACH HIM ANYTHING.
I MUST TAKE CARE OF THIS POOR MAN.
SEE YOU SOON, DR. SMITH?
MR. MYKO, YOU'RE BASICALLY A VERY KIND PERSON.
VERY SOON.
AND THEN THE ALIEN SLOWLY TURNED TOWARD DAD.
IT WAS LIKE DAVID FACING GOLIATH.
AND THEN THE GIANT CHARGED!
DAD CLENCHED HIS HANDS IN A DOUBLE FIST-- WILL, PLEASE.
ALL RIGHT. THAT'S ENOUGH. BUT I WAS JUST GETTING TO THE BEST PART.
THAT'S ALL RIGHT, DEAR. WE DON'T NEED A BLOW-BY-BLOW DESCRIPTION.
YOUR DAD WASN'T TOO BADLY HURT, AND THAT'S WHAT COUNTS.
BOY, I WISH I'D BEEN THERE. JOHN, YOU REALLY COVERED YOURSELF WITH GLORY.
YES, HE COVERED HIMSELF WITH BLOOD TOO-- HIS OWN.
REALLY, DON, I'M SURPRISED AT YOU.
OH, DON'S NOT CONDONING THE FIGHT, DARLING. IT'S JUST THAT--
WELL, WHEN IT'S FORCED ON YOU LIKE THAT, YOU-- YOU CAN'T RUN AWAY.
WELL, WHEN YOUR OPPONENT IS BIGGER AND STRONGER THAN YOU ARE,
IT'S ONLY SENSIBLE TO BACK AWAY.
I THINK THAT'S KIND OF COWARDLY.
[ John ] WHY DON'T WE JUST DROP THE SUBJECT?
HE'S QUITE RIGHT, YOU KNOW. THERE IS NO PRIDE INVOLVED IN HIS VICTORY.
I DISAGREE WITH YOU, DR. SMITH.
THE ALIEN DAD BEAT WAS A REAL TOUGH CUSTOMER.
YOU MISSED MY POINT, WILLIAM. YOUR FATHER HAD NO CHOICE BUT TO FIGHT.
EVEN A RABBIT WILL MAKE A STAND WHEN HE HAS NO OTHER CHOICE.
LOOK WHO'S TALKING-- SMITH, THE MAN OF ACTION.
SPARE ME THE INANE INNUENDOS, MAJOR.
WHEN AN OPPORTUNITY IS OFFERED, I SELDOM FAIL TO SEIZE UPON IT.
YEAH, AND USUALLY AT OUR EXPENSE TOO.
I KNOW WHERE THIS CONVERSATION'S GOING,
SO LET'S PUT AN END TO IT ONCE AND FOR ALL.
SMITH, I'M NOT GONNA FIGHT IN MYKO'S GAMES, AND THAT IS FINAL.
- GOOD. I SECOND THE MOTION. - BUT YOU HAVE EVERYTHING TO WIN AND NOTHING TO LOSE.
MR. MYKO SAID HE COULD MAKE YOU A CHAMPION.
DAD COULD BEAT ANYONE IF HE REALLY WANTED TO. ISN'T THAT SO, SIR?
WELL, IN MOST INSTANCES, I SUPPOSE I CAN GIVE A GOOD ACCOUNT OF MYSELF,
BUT PRIMARILY, SON, I'M A SCIENTIST.
A MAN OF BOOKS, NOT BATTLES, UNFORTUNATELY.
SMITH, WILL YOU STOP TALKING NONSENSE?
WHAT KIND OF A CHANCE WOULD JOHN HAVE GOING UP AGAINST A PROFESSIONAL FIGHTER, HMM?
PERSONALLY, I THINK HE WOULD WIN. AH!
AND SO WOULD WILL. OF COURSE, ON THE OTHER HAND,
IF HE'S AFRAID OF BEING DEFEATED--
ALL RIGHT, SMITH. SINCE YOU'RE SO BRAVE,
AND WITH MYKO'S HELP YOU COULD BE A CHAMPION,
WHY DON'T YOU OFFER TO FIGHT?
BUT GET OFF ME!
GOOD HEAVENS. NOW, WHY DO YOU SUPPOSE HE GOT SO UPSET?
DR. SMITH, YOU TRY MY PATIENCE.
IF AT FIRST YOU DON'T SUCCEED, TRY, TRY AGAIN.
YOU WANTED TO SPEAK WITH ME?
I HAVE FOUND AN IDEAL CANDIDATE FOR THE GAMES, AN EARTH MAN.
VERY GOOD.
WE HAVE LONG WONDERED ABOUT THOSE ALIENS.
HAVE YOU REACHED AN AGREEMENT WITH HIM? NOT AS YET.
HE'S DIFFERENT FROM OUR OTHER CANDIDATES.
NEITHER RICHES NOR HONORS WILL TEMPT HIM.
- PERHAPS HE IS A COWARD. - I DO NOT BELIEVE SO.
I HAD ONE OF OUR FIGHTERS DELIBERATELY ATTACK HIM. HE WAS QUICK TO DEFEND HIMSELF.
I HAVE HEARD MANY TALES ABOUT THE WORLD KNOWN AS EARTH.
ITS PEOPLE ARE STRANGE AND UNPREDICTABLE.
BEFORE WE TAKE ANY ACTION,
IT WOULD BE WELL IF WE KNEW MORE ABOUT THEM.
OUR MILITARY LEADERS WILL THEREFORE BE INTERESTED...
IN A MATCH BETWEEN AN EARTH MAN AND ONE OF OUR ATHLETES.
GET THE ALIEN TO FIGHT.
IT IS VERY IMPORTANT TO OUR FUTURE PLANS.
IF HE REFUSES TO COOPERATE, THERE ARE OTHER EARTH MEN HERE.
ONE OF THEM MUST BE IN THE GAMES.
I UNDERSTAND.
ALL RIGHT, WILL. STAND CLEAR.
GOOD MORNING, GOOD MORNING.
AS YOU WELL KNOW, MY MECHANICAL KNOWLEDGE IS LIMITED,
BUT I WOULD BE MOST HAPPY TO BE OF SOME ASSISTANCE.
WHY, DR. SMITH, YOUR VOLUNTEERING TO WORK...
IS SOMETHING LIKE A-- A CAT OFFERING TO BE FRIENDS WITH A CANARY.
THERE'S GOT TO BE AN ULTERIOR MOTIVE IN IT SOMEWHERE.
I SAW YOU HANDLING THIS HEAVY PIECE OF EQUIPMENT. I WAS MOST IMPRESSED.
- IT'S JUST A QUESTION OF WEIGHT DISTRIBUTION. - AND STRENGTH.
I HADN'T REALIZED THAT YOU WERE SO ATHLETIC.
DAD WAS A THREE-LETTER MAN IN COLLEGE.
HE HAD AN OFFER TO PLAY PROFESSIONAL FOOTBALL.
- REALLY? HOW INTERESTING. - IT WAS A LONG TIME AGO.
BUT IT'S PLAIN TO SEE THAT YOU'VE LOST NONE OF YOUR PHYSICAL PROWESS.
UH, DR. SMITH, IF YOU'RE SERIOUS ABOUT HELPING,
HOW ABOUT TAKING DOWN THAT BLOCK AND TACKLE? I WOULD BE DELIGHTED.
YOU KNOW, IT'S REALLY QUITE A SHAME...
THAT YOU TURNED DOWN MR. MYKO'S OFFER.
WE WON'T EVEN DISCUSS IT. BUT WE CAN'T HIDE FROM THE TRUTH, YOU KNOW.
YOU'RE SACRIFICING THE FUTURE OF THIS ENTIRE PARTY FOR YOUR OWN SELFISH REASONS.
YOU KNOW, THERE'S A LIMIT TO MY PATIENCE, AND YOU'RE RAPIDLY REACHING IT.
HOW COULD I REMAIN SILENT WHEN THIS GOLDEN OPPORTUNITY IS KNOCKING AT OUR DOOR,
AND ALL YOU CAN DO IS PRETEND NO ONE IS AT HOME?
THINK OF IT. YOU WOULD BE A HERO TO YOUR FAMILY.
WILL COULD LOOK AT HIS FATHER WITH PRIDE INSTEAD OF TURNING AWAY IN SHAME.
- THAT'S ENOUGH, SMITH. - I CANNOT REMAIN SILENT.
IF YOU'RE NOT OUT OF MY SIGHT WITHIN TWO SECONDS,
I'M GONNA DEMONSTRATE SOME OF THAT ATHLETIC PROWESS ON YOU.
ACCEPT MR. MYKO'S OFFER.
SAVE OUR INTREPID LITTLE BAND FROM THIS LIFE OF HARDSHIP.
ALL RIGHT. TIME'S UP!
YOU'RE MAKING A MISTAKE. [ Gasps ]
ALL RIGHT. SAY WHAT'S ON YOUR MIND, SON.
I WASN'T THINKING ANYTHING, SIR.
OH, COME ON.
I WAS JUST WONDERING IF, WELL, MAYBE DR. SMITH'S RIGHT.
IT WOULDN'T DO ANY HARM TO ENTER MR. MYKO'S GAMES,
AND IF YOU WON-- WE COULD ALL GO HOME...
AND LIVE HAPPILY EVER AFTER?
- SOMETHING LIKE THAT. - YOU'RE DISAPPOINTED IN ME, AREN'T YOU, SON?
WELL, OF COURSE YOU ARE.
EVERY SON WANTS TO FEEL THAT HIS FATHER'S THE GREATEST, THAT HE CAN SUCCEED IN ANYTHING.
- AND YOU CAN TOO! - NO. NO, SON, I CAN'T.
I'M A MAN LIKE ANY OTHER MAN.
SOME THINGS I DO WELL. OTHERS I DON'T DO SO WELL.
YOU COULD WIN IN MR. MYKO'S GAMES. I KNOW YOU COULD.
MAYBE. BUT I'M NOT A FIGHTING MAN, SON.
I'M A SCIENTIST.
MY BATTLES ARE FOUGHT IN A LABORATORY, NOT A PRIZE RING.
YOU UNDERSTAND.
- I GUESS SO. - LET'S GET BACK TO WORK.
IT ALL LOOKS RIDICULOUSLY EASY. IF ONLY YOUR FATHER HAD AGREED.
CHEER UP, DR. SMITH. WE'LL GET BACK TO EARTH SOMEDAY, SOMEHOW.
SPARE ME THE YOUTHFUL ENTHUSIASM, WILLIAM.
GOLDEN OPPORTUNITIES COME BUT ONCE IN A LIFETIME.
OH, DEAR.
WELL, COME ALONG. WE MAY AS WELL TELL MR. MYKO THE BAD NEWS.
[ Gasps ] WILLIAM, I THINK WE'D BETTER RETURN TO THE SPACESHIP.
THERE'S NOTHING TO BE AFRAID OF, DR. SMITH.
GROMACK'S NOT DANGEROUS. MR. MYKO SAID SO.
YES, I'M SURE, BUT DOES GROMACK KNOW THAT?
YOU ARE RIGHT, WILL ROBINSON. HE WILL NOT HARM YOU.
YOU'VE COME AT AN EXCELLENT TIME.
MY FIGHTERS ARE HAVING A SPECIAL TRAINING SESSION.
THAT'S GREAT. CAN WE WATCH THEM WORK OUT? OF COURSE.
CAREFUL, WILLIAM.
DR. SMITH, I'M DISAPPOINTED NOT TO SEE PROFESSOR ROBINSON HERE WITH YOU.
HE WAS BUSY. POSSIBLY TOMORROW.
I SINCERELY HOPE SO.
- WILLIAM. - YES, SIR?
PERHAPS WE SHOULD VISIT WITH MR. MYKO AT SOME OTHER TIME. IT'S GETTING A BIT LATE.
THE BOY WILL ENJOY THE ACTIVITIES, AND SO WILL YOU, DR. SMITH.
OH, PLEASE, DR. SMITH. JUST FOR A LITTLE WHILE?
WELL, PERHAPS FOR A LITTLE WHILE.
I'LL HAVE GROMACK HERE DEMONSTRATE SOME FEATS OF STRENGTH FOR YOU.
[ Speaking Alien Language ]
GROMACK CAN LIFT 40 TIMES HIS OWN WEIGHT.
WHAT ELSE CAN GROMACK DO, SIR?
GROMACK. [ Alien Language ]
[ Yells ]
FUN! GOLLY!
UH, MR. MYKO. HMM?
WHAT IS THAT STRANGE-LOOKING CONTRAPTION OVER THERE?
OH, COME. LET ME SHOW YOU.
WE CALL THIS THE WHEEL OF LIFE.
IT COMES FROM THE PLANET LOTHAR.
THE WHEEL OF LIFE. AH. AH. MUSTN'T TOUCH.
THESE TUBES APPEAR TO BE WEAPONS OF SOME SORT.
YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT, DR. SMITH.
FIVE OF THESE WEAPONS SEND FORTH HARMLESS PUFFS OF SMOKE.
THE SIXTH IS A DEADLY LASER BEAM.
NOW, TWO OPPONENTS FACE EACH OTHER ACROSS THE WHEEL.
TAKING TURNS, EACH PRESSES A BUTTON,
WHICH ACTIVATES THE WEAPON AT HIS OPPONENT.
IF THE WEAPON IS A BLANK,
THE WHEEL ROTATES INTO THE NEXT POSITION...
AND THE GAME CONTINUES...
UNTIL THE DEADLY LASER BEAM ENDS IT.
LET ME DEMONSTRATE.
[ Yelps ] GOOD HEAVENS.
- IT'S LIKE RUSSIAN ROULETTE. - IT'S A DIABOLICAL MACHINE.
IT GIVES ME THE SHUDDERS JUST TO LOOK AT IT.
I SURE WISH DAD WERE HERE TO SEE IT.
HE WOULD HARDLY BE INTERESTED.
HE PREFERS MORE INTELLECTUAL PURSUITS.
AH, THERE IS THE EVIL IN BEING TOO CIVILIZED.
ALL TOO TRUE, SIR.
FORTUNATELY, HOWEVER, WILL IS BETTER ADJUSTED.
HE UNDERSTANDS THE JOY OF HONEST PHYSICAL COMBAT.
DOES HE? WELL.
THEN HE WILL BE INTERESTED IN THIS TRAINING DEVICE. THIS IS USED FOR HUNTING.
UNLESS THE WEAPON IS FIRED...
WITHIN THREE FEET OF THE TARGET, [ Yelps ]
IT FALLS HARMLESSLY TO THE GROUND.
IT SURE PUTS THE ANIMAL AWFULLY CLOSE.
TOO CLOSE FOR COMFORT, IF YOU ASK ME.
I GIVE IT TO YOU. PERHAPS YOU'LL WISH TO TEST YOUR BRAVERY WITH IT.
- THANK YOU VERY MUCH, SIR. - WILLIAM,
WOULDN'T YOU LIKE TO GO AND HAVE A LOOK AROUND THE CAMP?
MR. MYKO AND I WILL CHAT FOR A WHILE. OKAY.
MR. MYKO, I WOULD LIKE TO TALK TO YOU ALONE, SIR.
ABOUT PROFESSOR ROBINSON? YES.
UNFORTUNATELY, MY ATTEMPTS TO GET HIM TO ENTER YOUR GAMES HAVE BEEN... UNSUCCESSFUL.
YOU ASSURED ME HE WOULD TAKE YOUR ADVICE.
HE GENERALLY DOES.
BUT HE CAN BE AN EXTREMELY STUBBORN MAN ON OCCASION.
I AM GRIEVOUSLY DISAPPOINTED, DR. SMITH.
AND I AM HEARTSICK, MR. MYKO,
ABSOLUTELY HEARTSICK OVER THE WHOLE THING.
YOU ARE NOT EXACTLY AN IDEAL SPECIMEN, BUT...
I HAVE AN IDEA.
MR. MYKO, ARE YOU SUGGESTING THAT I PARTICIPATE IN THE GAMES?
WHY NOT? WITH THE PROPER TRAINING, I THINK YOU'LL DO VERY WELL.
I THINK NOT. MY INCLINATIONS LIE...
TOWARD LESS STRENUOUS ACTIVITIES.
I SHALL BE FRANK WITH YOU, DR. SMITH.
I MUST HAVE AN EARTHLING IN THE GAMES.
IN ORDER TO ACHIEVE MY OBJECTIVE, I'M WILLING TO MAKE CERTAIN CONCESSIONS.
PRAY CONTINUE SIR. UH, YOU INTEREST ME.
WITH MY HELP, YOU COULD BE CHAMPION OF THE ENTIRE GALAXY.
NOT ONLY WOULD YOU RETURN TO EARTH, BUT YOU WOULD GO BACK A VERY RICH MAN.
YOU PRESENT A MOST TEMPTING OFFER.
YOU DID SAY SOMETHING ABOUT CONCESSIONS?
SO I DID.
I INVITE YOU TO PICK YOUR OWN OPPONENT.
IT'S VERY GENEROUS OF YOU, MY DEAR FRIEND.
I DO HATE TO REFUSE YOU, BUT--
[ Yelps ]
YOU, UH, DID SAY I COULD SELECT ANYONE?
ANYONE. EVEN THE LITTLE ONE?
COME NOW, DR. SMITH. YOU'RE TWICE HIS SIZE.
- YOU SAID ANYONE, MR. MYKO. - SO I DID.
THEN YOU, SIR, HAVE GOT YOURSELF...
AN EARTH MAN CONTESTANT.
WILL? WILL, WHERE ARE YOU?
AH, THERE YOU ARE, MY BOY.
ADIEU.
VERY CONVINCING PERFORMANCE, GEOO.
THE EARTH MAN HAS SELECTED YOU TO BE HIS OPPONENT.
YOU MAY RETURN TO YOUR SPARRING.
AT LEAST IT'LL BE A HUMANE VICTORY.
DR. SMITH WILL NEVER KNOW WHAT HIT HIM.
NINETY-SEVEN, 98,
99, TIME.
AH. THERE. TOWEL. ONE TOWEL.
AND REFRESHMENT. COMING UP.
AH!
ALL RIGHT, SMITH. WHAT'S ALL THIS ABOUT? INDEED.
HERE YA GO, CHAMP. AH, THANK YOU VERY MUCH, MY BOY.
DELICIOUS. NOW, THEN, PROFESSOR,
SINCE YOU HAVE SEEN FIT TO SHIRK YOUR DUTY,
I, DR. ZACHARY SMITH, MUST SAVE OUR BRAVE LITTLE BAND...
FROM ITS DIRE FATE.
I SHALL FIGHT IN THE GAMES OF GAMMA 6.
AND NOW YOU MUST EXCUSE ME. THE BARBELLS AWAIT.
CONDITIONING. CONDITIONING. COME ALONG, PENNY.
YOU, TOO, COACH.
DON, BY ANY CHANCE DID YOU JUST HEAR WHAT I HEARD?
I THINK I'M GONNA BE SICK. DAD, LOOK WHAT MR. MYKO GAVE ME.
WELL, THAT'S AN INTERESTING-LOOKING WEAPON, SON.
IT'S USED TO TEST HOW BRAVE YOU ARE. COME ON. I'LL SHOW YOU.
YOU HAVE TO GET WITHIN THREE FEET OF WHATEVER YOU'RE SHOOTING AT,
OR THE DART FALLS TO THE GROUND.
WATCH.
WELL, IT SEEMS TO BE A RATHER PRIMITIVE WAY OF PROVING COURAGE.
YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND, SIR. NO? WHY NOT?
YOU'RE TOO INTELLIGENT.
THAT'S THE FIRST TIME I EVER HEARD OF MENTAL CAPACITY BEING A DETRIMENT TO UNDERSTANDING.
IT ISN'T, BUT IT'S NOT NATURAL FOR YOU TO RELY ON BRAWN INSTEAD OF BRAINS.
UH, LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING, SON.
A MAN WITH A HIGH I.Q. WILL FIGHT JUST AS QUICKLY AS ANYONE ELSE,
PROVIDED THE SITUATION DEMANDS IT.
DR. SMITH WASN'T WORRIED ABOUT ACCEPTING MR. MYKO'S OFFER.
I WANT TO GET OFF THIS PLANET JUST AS BADLY AS HE DOES,
BUT I'M NOT JUMPING INTO ANYTHING THAT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE.
THERE ARE TOO MANY QUESTIONS ABOUT MR. MYKO'S GAMES THAT I CAN'T ANSWER.
AND ANOTHER THING--
SOMETIMES IT TAKES MORE COURAGE TO REFUSE A FIGHT THAN TO ACCEPT ONE.
WILL, DON'T YOU HAVE ANYTHING TO SAY?
- NOT RIGHT NOW, SIR. - YOU THINK ABOUT IT. NOW, LET'S HAVE SOME BREAKFAST.
THANK YOU, BUT I'VE GOT TO HELP DR. SMITH GET IN SHAPE FOR THE GAMES.
AH, MY BOY. MY MUSCLES ARE LIKE STRANDS OF STEEL.
YOU SURE ARE TAKING YOUR TRAINING SERIOUSLY, SIR.
I ALWAYS SAY, IF YOU DO IT AT ALL, DO IT WELL. A GREAT DEAL DEPENDS UPON MY WINNING. TOWEL.
ONE TOWEL COMING UP. AND REFRESHMENT.
YES, SIR. WHY ARE YOU STANDING THERE...
LIKE A MECHANICAL MONOLITH?
MASSAGE, MASSAGE! SUPPOSE MY MUSCLES STIFFEN?
DO YOU WANT ME TO CATCH COLD?
AH, THANK YOU, MY BOY. I AM SORRY, DR. SMITH.
SPARE ME THE APOLOGIES, YOU INEFFECTUAL INEPTITUDE.
AND BE CAREFUL. THE LAST TIME YOU VERY NEARLY CRACKED SEVERAL RIBS.
- PENNY, ISN'T IT TIME FOR MY IRON TABLETS? - I THINK SO, DR. SMITH.
- GIVE THEM HERE, MY DEAR. GIVE THEM HERE. - THEY'RE IN THE SPACESHIP.
YOU NEGLECTED TO BRING THEM WITH YOU? FOR SHAME, PENNY, FOR SHAME.
- FETCH THEM AT ONCE! YOU HEAR? - YES, SIR.
GOOD MORNING.
I THOUGHT I'D DROP BY AND SEE HOW OUR FUTURE GALAXY CHAMPION IS GETTING ON.
WE'VE GOT HIM TRAINED DOWN TO A FINE EDGE, MR. MYKO.
GOOD MORNING, SIR. [ Yells ]
GENTLY, YOU CLUMSY CLOD! I'M NOT MADE OF IRON, YOU KNOW.
A LITTLE WHILE AGO, YOU SAID YOUR MUSCLES WERE LIKE STRANDS OF STEEL, DR. SMITH.
AND SO THEY ARE, WILLIAM.
BUT LIKE THE STRINGS OF ANY FINELY TUNED INSTRUMENT,
THEY MUST BE PLAYED-- [ Gasps ] NOT PLUCKED!
WELL, DR. SMITH,
I'M HAPPY TO SEE YOU'VE RECRUITED YOUR SECONDS.
I TRUST THEY WILL BE WITH YOU AT RINGSIDE.
NATURALLY, SIR. I MUST HAVE MY DEAR FRIENDS IN MY CORNER AT MY HOUR OF TRIUMPH.
CONTINUE! CONDITIONING, CONDITIONING.
GANGWAY! DR. SMITH'S PILLS.
OH! OH!
WELL, WAS THAT OUR DAUGHTER OR WAS THAT A BIRD ON THE WING?
OH, JUST ONE OF DR. SMITH'S HELPERS CARRYING OUT AN ORDER.
HE HAS WILL AND PENNY WAITING ON HIM HAND AND FOOT.
YOU SHOULD SEE THE ROBOT-- AN ABJECT SLAVE. HMM.
I DON'T BELIEVE IT. AH, GOOD MORNING, PROFESSOR.
EXCUSE ME.
MR. MYKO, THERE'S SOME QUESTIONS ABOUT THE GAMES THAT PUZZLE ME.
PERHAPS YOU WOULD ANSWER THEM. IF I CAN, PROFESSOR ROBINSON.
SMITH-- NOW, HE'S NOT REALLY AN ATHLETE.
WHY DO YOU WANT HIM AS A CONTESTANT?
AS I TOLD YOU BEFORE, THE PRESENCE OF AN EARTH MAN IN THE GAMES...
WILL ADD CONSIDERABLE INTEREST.
WELL, I'M AFRAID THAT DR. SMITH WOULD ONLY ADD HUMOROUS INTEREST, MR. MYKO.
YOU KNOW, HE ALSO SEEMS QUITE ADAMANT ABOUT THE FACT THAT HE'S GONNA WIN.
- NOW, HOW WOULD HE KNOW THAT? - JUST CONFIDENCE ON HIS PART, THAT'S ALL.
WHAT IS THE PURPOSE OF THE GAMES, MR. MYKO?
- PURPOSE? - YEAH. THE REASON FOR HAVING THEM.
THE GAMES ARE A SERIES OF SPORTING EVENTS HELD FOR SPECTACLE AND ENTERTAINMENT.
AND NOTHING ELSE?
DR. SMITH, I SHALL SEE YOU TOMORROW AT THE GAMES.
HE SURE GOT HOT UNDER THE COLLAR FOR NOTHING.
I WONDER WHY. I'D LIKE TO KNOW THE ANSWER TO THAT ONE MYSELF.
WELL, THERE'S ONE WAY TO FIND OUT.
MR. MYKO WAS KIND ENOUGH TO VISIT US.
I THINK WE CAN REPAY THE COURTESY.
THAT'S A GOOD IDEA.
I THINK WE'LL DROP IN ON OUR PROMOTER FRIEND TONIGHT.
I THOUGHT IT ADVISABLE TO REPORT. ALL IS WELL.
YOU HAVE PERSUADED THE EARTH MAN TO ENTER THE GAMES?
YES. A CERTAIN DR. SMITH.
HOWEVER, HE WAS NOT MY FIRST CHOICE.
THAT IS UNFORTUNATE.
NEVERTHELESS, YOU HAVE A CONTESTANT.
I HAVE NOTIFIED ALL THE OTHER MILITARY LEADERS OF THE GALAXY.
THEY WILL BE WATCHING. THERE'S MYKO.
I'M NOT SURE THIS EARTH MAN IS ENTIRELY REPRESENTATIVE...
OF THE PEOPLE OF HIS PLANET.
HE SEEMS TO LACK COURAGE.
IT IS REGRETTABLE THAT YOU DID NOT GET A BETTER SPECIMEN.
BUT THE DECISION HAS BEEN MADE. WE WILL ACT ACCORDINGLY.
I'VE SELECTED GEOO TO FIGHT THE EARTH MAN.
AN EXCELLENT CHOICE.
IF THE EARTHLING DOES WELL, WE WILL REWARD HIM HANDSOMELY.
IF HE LOSES, HIS PLANET WILL SUFFER THE CONSEQUENCES.
WE WILL INVADE HIS WORLD AND SUBDUE IT.
TOMORROW WE SHALL KNOW WHICH IT IS TO BE.
NOW WE KNOW WHY MYKO WOULDN'T TELL US THE PURPOSE OF THE GAMES.
COME ON.
EVERY ATHLETE PARTICIPATING IN THE GAMES IS A PICKED REPRESENTATIVE OF HIS PLANET.
I SHALL REPRESENT THE PLANET EARTH. I SEE NOTHING WRONG WITH THAT.
PLENTY OF ROOM FOR THE BICEPS, MADAM.
MR. MYKO'S GAMES ARE NO JOKE. THEY'RE A DEADLY SERIOUS BUSINESS.
I'M FULLY AWARE OF THE RESPONSIBILITIES INVOLVED.
YOU KNOW, SMITH, IF YOU HAPPEN TO LOSE, YOU COULD BE PLACING EARTH IN GREAT DANGER.
I HAVE NO INTENTION OF BEING DEFEATED.
WELL, OF COURSE YOU HAVEN'T, BUT SOMETHING MIGHT GO WRONG.
YOU FORGET, MADAM, I'VE SEEN MY OPPONENT.
LET ME ASSURE YOU I SHALL BE AN EASY WINNER.
JUST BECAUSE YOU'RE MATCHED AGAINST SOME LITTLE ALIEN DOESN'T MEAN YOU'RE GONNA WIN.
- THIS COULD BE SOME TRICK. - SPARE ME YOUR DIRE DOUBTS, MAJOR.
MR. MYKO IS A GENTLEMAN OF INTEGRITY.
HE HAS ASSURED ME THAT I SHALL BE THE CHAMPION, AND I BELIEVE HIM.
OH, I GIVE UP. YOU'RE IMPOSSIBLE.
WHEN I AM THE GALAXY HERO AND OUR SPACESHIP IS BEING REPAIRED,
YOU, MAJOR, WILL SING A DIFFERENT TUNE.
AS MUCH AS WE APPRECIATE YOUR DESIRE TO HELP US,
I CANNOT ALLOW YOU TO PARTICIPATE IN THE GAMES.
LET ME REMIND YOU, PROFESSOR--
YOU HAVE NO AUTHORITY OVER ME.
UNTIL THE GAMES ARE OVER, YOU'RE NOT TO LEAVE THIS CAMPSITE. THAT'S AN ORDER.
YOU'RE TO SEE TO IT THAT DR. SMITH STAYS HERE.
I DON'T CARE HOW YOU DO IT.
THERE IS ONLY ONE WAY TO HANDLE A TIGER.
LET ME OUT OF HERE AT ONCE, YOU DESPOTIC DUNCE!
DO YOU HEAR ME? LET ME OUT!
I REFUSE TO REMAIN HERE FOR ANOTHER MOMENT.
OH, DEAR. I PROMISE NOT TO RUN AWAY.
ISN'T MY WORD GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU? NO.
YOU OUGHT TO BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF, AFTER ALL I'VE DONE FOR YOU.
DONE FOR ME?
YES. WHAT WERE YOU BEFORE WE MET?
A HULKING MASS OF MECHANICAL IGNORANCE.
A NOTHING. A NOBODY.
WHO PROGRAMMED YOU?
WHO SPOON-FED YOU THE FACTS OF LIFE...
AND MADE YOU WHAT YOU ARE TODAY-- A SLEEK, SOPHISTICATED, CHARMING COMPANION?
- ANSWER ME. WHO? - YOU DID, DR. SMITH.
YES. AND WHO KEEPS YOU OILED AND SHINED AND WORKING PROPERLY?
- YOU DO, DR. SMITH. - YES.
I'VE BEEN YOUR FRIEND, YOUR CONFIDANT, YOUR PROTECTOR,
AND NOW YOU REPAY ME LIKE THIS.
I THINK I'M GOING TO CRY.
FORGIVE ME, DR. SMITH. I AM TRULY INDEBTED TO YOU.
BUT I HAVE MY INSTRUCTIONS.
- I UNDERSTAND, MY DEAR BOY. - ARE WE STILL FRIENDS?
OF COURSE WE ARE. SHALL WE SHAKE HANDS?
THERE!
THOUGHT YOU'D GET THE BEST OF ME, DID YOU?
WELL, YOU'D BETTER THINK AGAIN,
YOU TRAITOROUS, TIN-PLATED FUGITIVE FROM A JUNKYARD.
THERE.
I'LL BE OUT OF HERE IN A TRICE. THERE WE GO.
ADIEU, NINNY.
DR. SMITH.
WHERE'S DR. SMITH? I AM A FAILURE.
I LET HIM TRICK ME. I HAVE FAILED.
THAT'S NOT IMPORTANT NOW. HE'S GONE TO MR. MYKO'S GAMES.
WE CAN'T LET HIM FACE ALL THOSE ALIENS ALONE.
AND BESIDES, WE'RE SUPPOSED TO ACT AS HIS SECONDS, REMEMBER?
AFFIRMATIVE. COME ON.
"TIGER SMITH." COMPLETELY APROPOS.
NOW, THEN. [ Inhales Deeply ] SPLENDID FORM.
YES. GROMACK, INDEED.
NOW THEN. [ Yells ]
[ Gasping ]
OH, DR. SMITH. I WAS BEGINNING TO THINK YOU HAD CHANGED YOUR MIND.
I EXPERIENCED SOME SLIGHT DELAY, MR. MYKO.
YES.
THANK YOU SO MUCH. EVERYTHING IS READY AND WAITING FOR YOU.
SO GREAT IS THE INTEREST IN YOUR EVENT, I'VE SCHEDULED IT FIRST.
OH, MR. MYKO, HOW KIND YOU ARE TO GO TO SO MUCH TROUBLE FOR ME.
WELL, YOU ARE THE STAR ATTRACTION, DR. SMITH. NATURALLY, MY DEAR SIR.
THESE SOLARIZED CAMERAS WILL CARRY THE PICTURES OF YOUR BOUT.
INDEED. I DO HOPE I LOOK ALL RIGHT.
WITH MILLIONS OF SPECTATORS WATCHING, I DO WANT TO MAKE A GOOD IMPRESSION, YOU KNOW.
I'VE NO DOUBT THAT YOU WILL. AH. THERE IS YOUR OPPONENT ENTERING THE RING.
WELL, SHALL WE BEGIN? IF I'M TO BE THE CHAMPION, THE SOONER THAT HAPPENS, THE BETTER.
OH, DEAR. YES.
THIS THE WAY? I SEE.
OH, MR. MYKO, YOU HAVE A VERY INTERESTING ARRANGEMENT OF ROPES, I THINK.
[ Groans ] YES. HERE WE ARE.
WELL, THEN. YES. EXCELLENT. THANK YOU, SIR.
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, IN THIS CORNER,
FROM THE PLANET ZENNKOA,
THE MIGHTY MITE, GEOO!
AND IN THIS CORNER,
REPRESENTING THE PLANET EARTH,
PROFESSOR ZACHARY "TIGER" SMITH.
GENTLEMEN, YOU BOTH KNOW WHAT'S AT STAKE.
I DON'T HAVE TO TELL YOU TO DO YOUR BEST.
IN THE EVENT OF A CLINCH, I WANT YOU TO BREAK CLEANLY.
IN THE EVENT OF A KNOCKDOWN, GO TO A NEUTRAL CORNER.
NOW, COME OUT FIGHTING AND SHAKE HANDS.
SO SORRY, BUT IT DOESN'T SEEM POSSIBLE, ACTUALLY.
ONE, TWO. ONE, TWO. ONE, TWO. DR. SMITH.
AH, MY DEAR FRIENDS, JUST IN TIME TO WITNESS MY VICTORY.
DR. SMITH, DON'T GO THROUGH WITH IT. IT'S TOO DANGEROUS.
DANGEROUS, INDEED. HAVE YOU SEEN MY OPPONENT?
HE WILL BE MERE CHILD'S PLAY FOR ME.
WARNING! APPEARANCES CAN BE DECEIVING.
SILENCE, YOU JABBERING JUDAS.
PLEASE WITHDRAW WHILE THERE'S STILL TIME. YOU KNOW WHAT'LL HAPPEN IF YOU LOSE.
THINK WHAT WILL HAPPEN WHEN I WIN.
NOW, STOP WORRYING, WILLIAM. THE OUTCOME OF THIS FIGHT IS INEVITABLE.
[ Bell Dings ] AH. THE BELL.
I SHALL GET THIS OVER WITH VERY QUICKLY. NEVER FEAR, SMITH IS HERE.
HERE! JUST A MOMENT. HELP ME WITH MY ROBE. I'M NOT QUITE READY. THAT WASN'T FAIR.
YOU DREADFUL, LITTLE MAN. NOT FAIR. I'M NOT QUITE READY, SIR.
HOW VERY RUDE!
I'LL ATTEND TO YOU IN JUST A MOMENT. [ Groans ] STAY AWAY!
PULL! PULL, WILL! AH! NOW THIS ONE.
GET AWAY. OH! I'LL ATTEND TO YOU AS SOON AS I GET LOOSE OF THIS ROBE!
AH!
AH. YOU SEE?
AS EASY AS PIE, JUST AS I TOLD YOU.
AND NOW FOR THE COUP DE GRÂCE.
AVAUNT. HAVE AT YOU, SIR. [ Groans ]
WHERE ARE YOU? COME BACK. I KNOW YOU'RE HERE SOMEWHERE, YOU DREADFUL LITTLE MAN.
HOW CAN DR. SMITH FIGHT SOMEONE HE CAN'T SEE?
I KNOW WHAT IS ABOUT TO HAPPEN, AND I CANNOT BEAR TO WATCH.
COME BACK HERE, GEOO! COME BACK!
[ Shouts ]
WHOA! [ Geoo Laughing ]
HOW DARE YOU! FOUL?
- NO, NO. FAIR BLOW. - I CLAIM A FOUL, SIR.
- [ Geoo Laughing ] - GOOD HEAVENS.
- HE'S IN BACK OF YOU. - [ Robot ] HE'S IN FRONT OF YOU.
HE'S IN BACK OF YOU. HE'S IN FRONT OF YOU.
HE'S IN BACK OF YOU.
WHERE IS HE? WHERE DID HE GO?
LOOK OUT!
OH, NO!
ONE, TWO, THREE,
FOUR-FIVE-SIX, SEVEN-EIGHT-NINE-- [ Bell Dings ]
DR. SMITH. HUH? WHAT? HUH?
COME ON, DR. SMITH. GET UP. I'M INNOCENT.
[ Groaning ] WHERE AM I?
DR. SMITH, ARE YOU ALL RIGHT? I'M PERFECTLY FINE.
DID YOU GET HIS LICENSE NUMBER? DR. SMITH IS OVERMATCHED.
IT IS FUTILE TO CONTINUE THE CONTEST. MAY THE BEST MAN WIN.
WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO? IF I CAN FIND HIM, I CAN BEAT HIM.
WE MUST SURRENDER. COME OUT, COME OUT, WHEREVER YOU ARE.
THE WINNER, BY DEFAULT--
YOU TRICKED HIM. IT WASN'T A FAIR FIGHT.
WHY NOT? YOU DIDN'T TELL HIM GEOO COULD DISAPPEAR.
HE NEVER ASKED ME. [ Chuckling Evilly ]
COME ON, DR. SMITH. LET'S GET BACK TO THE JUPITER. [ Groans ]
YES, WE MUST PREPARE FOR MY FIGHT WITH THE LITTLE ALIEN. DAD.
I'LL BE IN THERE PUNCHING. I'LL GET US BACK TO EARTH.
THANKS TO YOU, THERE MAY NOT BE AN EARTH TO GET BACK TO.
COME ALONG, TIGER. YES, COACH.
YOU WERE RIGHT, DAD. MR. MYKO WASN'T TO BE TRUSTED.
THERE'S NO SATISFACTION IN PROVING A POINT IF AS A RESULT THE EARTH'S GONNA BE ATTACKED.
DR. SMITH WASN'T THE ONLY ONE WRONG. SO WAS I.
NOW, YOU JUST LEARNED SOMETHING THROUGH EXPERIENCE, SON. THAT'S THE BEST WAY.
WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO NOW, DAD?
WELL, THE ALIENS THINK THAT THE EARTH PEOPLE CAN BE BEATEN EASILY.
WE'RE GONNA HAVE TO SHOW THEM THEY'RE WRONG.
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, THE WINNER...
BY DEFAULT,
LITTLE GEOO FROM THE PLANET OF ZENNKOA, OVER THE EARTH PEOPLE.
JUST A MINUTE, MYKO.
YOU MISSED A WONDERFUL FIGHT, PROFESSOR ROBINSON.
OF COURSE, DR. SMITH WAS NO MATCH FOR LITTLE GEOO.
YOU CAN'T JUDGE THE ACTIONS OF EARTH PEOPLE BY DR. SMITH.
I WOULD'VE PREFERRED SOMEONE ELSE, BUT I HAD NO CHOICE. YOU REFUSED TO FIGHT. REMEMBER?
WELL, THAT WAS MY ERROR. BUT I'M WILLING TO ACCEPT YOUR OFFER NOW.
TOO LATE, PROFESSOR. THE BOUT IS CONCLUDED.
WHAT'S THE MATTER, MYKO? ARE YOU AFRAID I'LL BEAT YOUR CHAMPION?
ALL RIGHT. YOU MAY FIGHT LITTLE GEOO IF YOU WISH.
BUT REMEMBER, NOTHING WILL BE CHANGED. YEAH, WE'LL SEE ABOUT THAT.
WHEN I GIVE THE SIGNAL, LET THE BOUT BEGIN.
CAREFUL, DAD. HE CAN DISAPPEAR.
TIME!
[ Geoo ] OOH, DON'T! [ Groaning ]
OH, HELP! OUCH! OOH!
- COME ON, DAD. - [ Geoo Groaning ]
OUCH! OH! PUT ME DOWN!
PUT ME-- I GIVE UP. OH, I GIVE UP.
OH! OH!
VERY INTERESTING EXHIBITION, PROFESSOR, BUT NOTHING HAS BEEN CHANGED.
THE DECISION TO INVADE EARTH HAS BEEN MADE.
BESIDES, YOU ARE MUCH TOO BIG FOR POOR LITTLE GEOO.
THEN HOW ABOUT GROMACK FOR SIZE?
I TOLD YOU IT WAS TOO LATE, PROFESSOR ROBINSON.
YOU HAD YOUR CHANCE TO FIGHT IN THE GAMES.
THE EARTH PEOPLE MUST SUFFER THE CONSEQUENCE OF YOUR REFUSAL.
GROMACK. [ Alien Language ]
THERE'S NOTHING ELSE YOU CAN DO, SIR. THERE HAS TO BE SOMETHING.
IT'S OUR ONLY CHANCE OF S--
IT'S OUR ONLY CHANCE OF SAVING EARTH.
MYKO!
THERE'S ONE CHALLENGE YOU CAN'T REFUSE-- THE WHEEL OF LIFE.
PROFESSOR ROBINSON, THE DECISION HAS ALREADY BEEN MADE.
YOU SAY THAT EARTH MEN ARE WEAK AND WITHOUT COURAGE.
WELL, LET'S SEE WHAT THE WHEEL OF LIFE HAS TO SAY.
VERY WELL, PROFESSOR. AS YOU WISH.
WE SHALL TEST ONE ANOTHER WITH THE WHEEL OF LIFE.
DAD, YOU CAN'T.
SON, WHATEVER HAPPENS, KNOW THAT THIS HAD TO BE DONE.
PROFESSOR.
YOU MAY GO FIRST.
NOW IT IS MY TURN.
WE'RE DOWN TO THE LAST TWO, MYKO.
SINCE YOU GAVE ME THE FIRST TURN, THE NEXT IS YOURS.
GO AHEAD. IT'S YOUR TURN.
IT'S NO LONGER 5 TO 1 NOW. IT'S EVEN MONEY.
WHAT'S THE MATTER? DON'T YOU LIKE THOSE ODDS?
PUSH IT.
YOU'D HAVE BEEN A WINNER, MYKO.
IT WOULD SEEM THAT EARTH MEN HAVE MORE COURAGE THAN YOU GAVE THEM CREDIT FOR.
WE'RE A PEACEFUL PEOPLE BY NATURE,
AND JUST BECAUSE WE DON'T LIKE TO FIGHT DOESN'T MEAN WE WON'T.
I'M CERTAIN THE MILITARY LEADERS OF OUR GALAXY RECOGNIZE THAT NOW, PROFESSOR ROBINSON.
THEY'VE WITNESSED THE CONTEST.
YOUR PLANET WILL NOT BE INVADED.
THAT'S WHAT I CAME TO HEAR.
COME ON, SON.
GEE, DAD, YOU WERE GREAT.
MAY I ADD MY CONGRATULATIONS, PROFESSOR. YOU WERE MAGNIFICENT.
WE DON'T NEED ANY INGRATIATING SPEECHES FROM YOU, SMITH.
IF IT HADN'T BEEN FOR YOU, WE WOULDN'T BE IN THIS SITUATION IN THE FIRST PLACE.
YOU'RE QUITE RIGHT TO EXCORIATE ME.
OF ALL THE DUMB, STUPID THINGS YOU'VE EVER DONE, THIS IS THE GRAND TOUR DE FORCE--
[ Laughing ]
OH, THE PAIN. THE PAIN.
COME ON, TIGER. MAYBE MAUREEN CAN FIND YOU A BEEFSTEAK FOR THAT EYE.
COACH, INDEED! IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT.
WELL, I GUESS IT'S OVER. IN THE MORNING, LET'S GO LOOK FOR METEORITES.
MAYBE ALL SORTS OF EXCITING THINGS DROPPED.
HEY, LOOK WHAT I FOUND.
IT'S JUST AN OLD ALIEN BOTTLE. REALLY, CHILDREN.
AREN'T YOU AWARE THAT ANYTHING OF VALUE BURNS AS IT PASSES THROUGH OUR ATMOSPHERE?
YOU'LL FIND NOTHING BUT ROCKY CINDERS OUT THERE.
TOMORROW YOU'LL GET A CHANCE TO PROVE IT. I BEG YOUR PARDON?
WE'RE GONNA CHECK FOR DAMAGE. ALL OF US.
OH! YOU KNOW, WILL,
LIFE WAS MUCH MORE EXCITING IN THE PAST, AND YOU KNOW WHY?
BECAUSE MEN WERE NOT PESTERED WITH ALL OF THIS WORK FOOLISHNESS.
YOUR FATHER INVENTS ONE USELESS JOB AFTER ANOTHER.
THERE'S THE MINERAL DRILL. IT CHECKS OUT OKAY, TOO, I GUESS.
YOU'D BETTER DO THE CHECKING THIS TIME. MY BACK IS EXTREMELY DELICATE TODAY.
I THINK I SHALL TAKE A LITTLE NAP. I'LL CHECK THE DRILL ITSELF.
YES, DO THAT.
DR. SMITH, COULD YOU COME OVER HERE AND HOLD ONE OF THESE WRENCHES FOR ME?
THAT'S FUNNY. DR. SMITH, I JUST PUT ONE OF THE WRENCHES DOWN THERE.
NOW IT'S DISAPPEARED. WOULD YOU PLEASE HELP ME LOOK FOR IT?
GET ANOTHER ONE OUT OF THE TOOL BAG. I MUST REST MY BACK.
THAT'S GONE TOO. DID YOU TAKE THE TOOL BAG?
NOW, NOW, WILL. NO LUNCH UNTIL WE'VE FINISHED WORK.
DR. SMITH! [ Gasps ]
[ Gasping ] STOP!
DOGS! INFIDELS!
PREPARE TO DIE!